Shifting to Feeling Good

When pain has been a part of daily life for many years, feeling good in the body becomes an obsession. But when we do everything we can to get rid of the pain we then become focused on the pain rather than on feeling good. Our brains are wired to focus on the negative as a survival mechanism, so it becomes a habit to focus on the part of the body which does not feel good. Paradoxically, the way to feel better is to focus on what works in the body rather than on that which doesn’t work. Then the body, being in a higher vibration as a result of positive thoughts in the mind, does its own healing.

So how do you shift away from the pain (which is often screaming loudly), and towards pleasure? As I am experiencing pain in my back, my fingers are typing and feeling great. And it doesn’t stop there… my heart is beating strongly, my lungs are allowing me to breathe easily, my legs are strong and I am mobile, the list goes on and on. The shift happens in the mind and it starts simply but day by day as I practice shifting my thoughts towards what feels good, my body does feel better, albeit incrementally and not necessarily exponentially as I would wish.

To accelerate this process, I have been practicing a very simple method as taught by my spiritual teachers, known as The Council. (For more on The Council, see saralandon.com). In this simple process called the “blink-reset,” anything that feels of low vibration, such as negative thoughts or difficult emotions, can be immediately released and the result is a sense of freedom and having a clean slate to begin again in a higher vibration and with positive intention, which is where the body heals itself. All those stories which are blocking me from a healthy pain-free life, all those feelings of not being good enough or deserving, any thought or anger around the pain always being there, anything at all that doesn’t serve my healing process is erased. The reset button is pressed and the reboot has begun. Here is the process:

step 1. catch yourself in the old story

step 2. close your eyes

step 3. take a deep conscious breath

step 4. open your eyes

step 5. focus on what you want to create

The conscious breath invites my Higher Self and my Spirit Guides in and gives them a moment in which to enter my field. When I open my eyes after having released whatever is disturbing my well-being simply by being present to the moment, there is a sense of emptiness where I can shift my mind to whatever I wish to create which could be ease and freedom or anything else I desire. And thus, I allow my body to heal itself. It is but a moment in time and a very powerful one.

There are however, some persistent thoughts that will keep coming back. I found that those need some extra care because they are an indication of a part of me which is suffering and has come out of the subconscious in order to be aknowledged before it will release. It could be that the situation needs some resolution. So I give myself some tender loving compassion from a higher perspective, as a mother loving her hurt child, and then these more persistent thoughts/feelings do fade away given some time. I found that having been compassionate with myself, the new positive thoughts imagining a better reality tend to occur spontaneously on their own and for me, that is a sign that I have healed that suffering part of me.

Shifting to feeling good is about choosing to feel good. It starts with the mind. The body follows.

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Celebrating the Harvest

It is the Harvest Full Moon and Thanksgiving (in Canada), time to appreciate, celebrate, and reap what we have sown. Unfortunately, our human nature is to focus more on the negative in our lives rather than on the positive, and always to want more of what we think is better for us which leaves us never satisfied. But in fact, if we focus on the positive, more of that will come.

So I take this opportunity now to harvest all the goodness that I have grown into my life over the past few months; I feel more joy and more love. I have many moments of pure bliss that come from very ordinary occurrences. I feel stronger physically and emotionally. I may not yet have the vibrant health that I desire but there are synchronicities that  show me that it is absolutely on its way.

For instance, I had an interesting encounter the other day doing my errands; as I was crossing the street to go to the library, I saw a group of people walking together, all wearing bright green t-shirts. I realized that it was part of a team following a young man from the next town who had been in the local news for the past couple of years. Sébastien Jacques was terminally ill and the community raised money to send him to top neurosurgeons in California. The operation was successful and soon after his return home and his recovery, he set out on a 5,000 km walk across the States to meet up with his medical team there. His desire was to give hope and courage to those facing life challenges. He was on the last leg of his heroic journey back to his home town, only a few hours of walking left, when I bumped into him.

Dancing in the Light

We shook hands and exchanged a few banal words and then I looked at him and really saw him, feeling his energy; exuding from his body was complete happiness, vibrant health, and a very strong sense of purpose. He was radiating all these qualities like the sun. A few more less- banal words this time, and a hug, and he was on his way. I continued to the library where I sat down to take it all in. I was very moved; my heart had opened and tears were flowing. This young man had given me hope and courage and what I saw in him was a mirror to who I am. Life had put him on my path to show me that I am moving in the right direction, that what I wish for is there for me.

I used to feel envious when I heard of people recovering from chronic illness or pain, feeling resentful that it always happened to others and never to myself. But now, I am filled with joy by these stories because whenever anything of that nature crosses my path, whether a meeting in person, whether reading about it, or seeing it in the media, I take it as a sign that the universe hears me and is doing everything to bring me my desire of vibrant health and happiness. So I too am right on purpose. Part of my recovery is looking for these signs, opening myself to receiving them from Life and allowing myself to be uplifted…. right into extraordinary health and exuberant happiness…… or something even better!

Touching Enlightenment

There Are No Mistakes

The healing journey is most definitely a huge roller coaster ride. The ups and downs are difficult to navigate but fortunately, I have found that through self-love and through meditative practices that raise consciousness, the wild Swiss Alps have scaled down to Monteregian Hills (Quebec geology) over time.

Invariably, very regularly, I strain my back. It used to put me down for interminable dark days (and previously, weeks or months) and now thankfully, the intensity of the pain has reduced and I bounce back quicker. This week, it was all about apple-picking, my autumn pleasure. I’ve strained my back in the past picking apples so I should have known better; I should have used a cart. And there was a tiny voice way back in my mind which I barely heard that said so, but I felt myself responding that I am stronger now and I won’t be picking too many to carry….. well, not so. I overdid it.

So then I had to notice and love all those suffering parts of me; the angry one who told me that I overdid it yet again, the one who was scared of the punishment because she did something wrong, and most of all, the little child who was punished for her enthusiasm, for having too much fun and being too rowdy, too loud. In those days, corporal punishment was de rigueur and I’m sure my father, being a sensitive soul, did not enjoy this particular parental role.

As I was loving myself the best way I could, listening to all the inner voices, giving them space and lending them an ear, I started hearing these words:

“There are no mistakes.”

“You can’t do this wrong.” (“This” meaning “Life”).

And I began shedding all those old stories and ideas that what I have ever done which caused me harm was somehow wrong and a mistake. For everything that happens has its own purpose towards our spiritual evolution if we choose to embrace it as such. Looking back, I can see it but in the moment, it is harder to see, much less to accept. However, the process does begin as soon as I enter the sanctuary of my body and feel the sensations and feelings of discomfort and pain. My body is teaching me to release the past so that the future can manifest brighter and more joyful. Inevitably, the inner children find their passion and joy again and peace reigns in my heart and soul.

Everything is happening according to Divine Plan and in Divine Timing.

 

It is all perfect, exactly as it should be.

I can’t do it wrong.

There are no mistakes.

There is only Love.

The Answer to all my Problems

Of late, it has become quite clear to me that what causes most of my suffering is the human tendency to evaluate and judge all that happens. We push away our experience as soon as the mind begins labelling the event as good or bad or neutral; we are then immediately out of direct experience and in our heads rather than in our bodies. And having already written in several recent posts about my resolve to allow experience to be, I have come to the conclusion that the solution to everything is, in a nutshell:

I am who I am

and

It is what it is.

There is perhaps a fatalistic view to this statement, however, I do not see it in that light. I see it more as living impeccably with the intention of doing everything to the best of my ability for myself and all involved, while at the same time not analyzing or judging what happens as a result of my actions or that of others.

To be sure, it is no small task as we have brains that constantly mutter about something or other and the overall tendency is to try to control ourselves and others and all of life, but this is about leaving the past behind, as soon as the moment is over, and letting judgments go while taking in the discrimination so that actions can be as impeccable as possible.

For a long time, I tried to figure out what the pain was about, what my body was telling me. And because I couldn’t “get it,” I felt much frustration, shame, guilt, and grief around living a limited life.  But what if it just is there and there is nothing to figure out, nothing to fix or change? What if it just is?

Being exactly with what is also helps me come to terms with all the defects of my small self. Discrimination allows me to see what I may have done wrong while letting it go immediately ensures that I will be at peace with my ego-personality, which is the one I chose to have in this human realm and whether I like it or not, is here to stay for the duration. So I might as well enjoy my personality, complete with defects and delightful quirks.

In human life, if you feel that you have made a mistake, you don’t try to undo the past or the present, but you just accept where you are and work from there.

—Chögyam Trungpa Rinpoche, “Your Life Is Your Practice

 

 

Today, I celebrate my personality, just as it is!

I celebrate my body, just as it is!

And I celebrate Life just the way it is!

 

Riding the Waves of Powerful Energy

With the powerful energy of the lunar eclipse and today, the solar eclipse, these last few weeks have been very transformative for me with many wonderful shifts. I have felt the re-alignment after releasing old self-destructive patterns and now feel much closer to my heart and soul.

I had a stressful time at one point last week and while in meditation desiring to come back into balance, I felt great compassion from my higher self towards my personality self for creating difficulties in my life through my limiting beliefs and old habits. It was a very moving experience of love, understanding how my soul is doing its best to guide me along the challenging path I create for myself (and at the same time, there was total forgiveness for doing that).

I feel much more connected to my soul/heart and now realize that I’ve always had the longing to be there. I am very committed to making that connection my goal; nothing else is ever going to be as important for me. My soul desire is clear and so is my purpose. I feel complete.

I have also come to the realization that what I have been yearning for, which is Heaven on Earth, has actualized. I have been setting an intention every morning, to manifest love, joy, peace, harmony, beauty, and self-love and I had a sudden insight during a channeling of the Council by Sara Landon (saralandon.com) that in this moment, I have it all. I am experiencing the heaven on earth I have been wishing for. There is so much joy in my heart! And I feel good in my body. There may still be some pain and discomfort, but it has lessened and the suffering has diminished immensely often lasting but moments. No matter what happens in my body, I am at peace with my body. I have all the tools I need to come back to my heaven if ever I deviate for a little bit or if a situation unbalances me.

My longing has brought about the manifestation and it was happening little bits at a time until I had a sudden insight that here it all is, just as I had been waiting for; my heaven on earth, my place of peace, joy, love, beauty and harmony….. all here right now all around me and in my heart.

May it expand a thousand-fold and touch you, dear reader, as well as countless others who are yearning for the same heaven on earth. I believe that the fifth dimension is much nearer than we think.

Celebrating Peace with the Pain-Body

It’s been a rough ride these last few weeks; a lot of shame and guilt has been releasing around my physical issues and how they have blocked me for so long. Years of limitation has produced much regret and guilt around not being able to do what most people take for granted and about certain family events and obligations. So much of what my life has been and is, seemed to be weighted down with shame particularly if I compare myself to others. Chronic health problems result in a reduction of social activities and solitude is not understood or accepted in our society.

Sculpture by Daniel Haché

There is also deep shame around having worked so hard to heal, tried so many therapies and techniques, spent so much energy and effort, and still, the pain lingers, the discomfort in my body persists. It feels like failure, as if I’m not capable enough to heal myself or good enough to receive healing and am constantly doing something wrong spiritually. It is as if the pain is all my fault.

But with the energy of the last full moon along with the lunar eclipse and all the support I receive from the spirit realm, I feel a lifting of all that heaviness and a feeling of freedom. I am seeing my physical issues as simply experience; nothing to figure out, nothing to try to change. As I have written in the previous post (“Allowing Experience to Be”), experience has a life of its own and needs to resolve itself. So I let it be. And today, I celebrate my life, exactly how it has all unfolded with perfection and how it is now, and will be. There will often be something I do not want in my life but I know that it will always have its own purpose as well as its own unfolding process which I need not control.

For example, a family drama was happening at the cottage last week of which I was unaware yet was somehow feeling it and processing a lot of emotions not knowing where they were coming from. But the gift is that I finally feel cleared of the resentments I was holding onto and know from a deep compassionate place the sacred roles we have each chosen to take on in this family system. I love them more and I forgive them and myself and I know there is nothing to forgive anymore. I cannot be with them all together because of all the drama that occurs but I can love them and support them from my own inner place of tranquility and peace.

And I am so grateful to my body for keeping me away from the cottage because if I didn’t have all these physical issues, I probably would have been there as well and reacting to it, would have added to the drama myself.  I can handle these situations so much better from the nature sanctuary where I live. I can send light and love and be an agent of harmony from afar. I get my life. I finally am starting to get my life. And to love it.

When I am in resistance to the pain, I don’t understand its purpose in my life and I think that it needs to be gone. But now and then, I get a glimpse of the why of it and the divine reason for what I consider suffering but which is really my soul guiding me on the best possible path for my life. Without resistance to my path, the suffering is extinguished. When the light of insight shines into my mind, I see how my soul orchestrates it all for me and I feel peace.

Peace is infusing itself into the depths of my being and it feels good to my body even as the pain is there. I can celebrate my body just as it is right now.

I can trust my life and my path. All is unfolding perfectly according to divine plan.

Allowing Experience to Be

With chronic body ills, it feels as if there is constantly something wrong that needs fixing; some pain to alleviate, some emotion to release, some stress to reduce, some inner conflict to resolve, etc. Frankly, this fixing obsession is getting really old. In any case, life is forever bringing unexpected events and challenging circumstances so there is no escape from things going awry. I would like to allow Life to take care of everything for me and simply to let events unfold as they may, in other words, to release control. In truth, I don’t have control over life even though I think I do and constantly keep trying to control.

I am contemplating the idea that it doesn’t matter whether I feel good or bad, that there is a place inside me which is not attached to how things are in my life or in the world, and this part of me is really all that matters. I have felt this spaciousness and all-accommodating being-ness during meditation and it is powerful, strong, confident, un-shakeable. I am in the process of incorporating it into the rest of my daily life so that this meditative space is reachable whatever situation I find myself in.

The best way to find it is to feel my feet, straighten my spine and raise the top of my head. Immediately, there is a sense of connection with both earth and sky; I am but the lightning rod in between. I am allowing and opening so that energy can pass through me and then there is nothing to do. I release myself from changing the situation. All is well. Even my mistakes and imperfections are part of the perfection of the Universe. I am not wrong. My meditation teacher, Reggie Ray says that experience has a life of its own and needs to resolve itself. It helped me truly grasp that I am not in control and that experience is outside of “me.” It just exists through me.

This teaching was very helpful recently when I suffered another heart-breaking death of a pet cat. Jujube was struck by a car in exactly the same spot as my Little Dot exactly a year ago. Uncanny. The shock and the grief were much more bearable this time having learned much about acceptance and about connecting with the spirit of the loved one that transitioned. I found refuge in my body. My body felt and released the shock; my body showed me that experience was ordinary when I didn’t attach myself to mind’s contorting between past and future; my body allowed me to be at peace with this event. I kept coming back again and again to my power centre to experience the banality of the life that is continuing in spite of death. It felt just like any ordinary day where I experience all kinds of emotions and feelings moving through my body.

This way of living has become my path; there is always some trauma being released because I meditate and retrieve bits and pieces of my soul all the time and the traumas just flow through as long as the path is unimpeded. That is my continuing resolve for the rest of my life; stay on the path and allow, trusting that everything is happening for me and through me, nothing more.